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To start with, lets set the scene. You just met this girl, it’s either in a nightclub or daytime or in some social setting amongst friends.

You are attracted to her and possibly interested in dating her. Then during the conversation she asks ”do you have a girlfriend?”. We are going to discuss this today and what you should do.

If you are having trouble getting a girlfriend, then I suggest you try learning the sweet art of cold approach with me.

What Does It Mean When a Girl Asks if you have a Girlfriend?

From my experience, women never ask this question to unattractive (lower mate value) men. I’ve never been in a situation where I’ve overheard a girl asking a guy if he’s single, when said guy is of lower sexual market place value. From my experience, this just doesn’t happen.

Mostly (from my experience) women will see a low value male and simply assume that he’s single for the obvious reason that he’s of such low value.

And for her to ask such a silly question, could possibly be seen as a little insulting to the guy. So, I just assume that women won’t ask if you are single unless you have some value (in their opinion, which is mostly wrong) to add to girl that you could be dating.

Your Mate Value is Higher than you Think

My theory here, is that a girl will only ask if you are single or have a girlfriend if she thinks that you are valuable is some way to women in general. Now this is a great start and you can take it as a compliment, when a girl asks you this question. This should give you some confidence.

It doesn’t mean that she’s interested in dating you though. Maybe she’s married, lives with her boyfriend or she could even be your best friends mother.

Furthermore, she may not see you that way, maybe she see’s you ONLY as a friend but can still see how valuable you could be to other women. And maybe she’s asking because she thinks that you being single is such a waste of a good man.

I’d like you to start seeing this as a huge compliment!

How Should you Respond when a Girl Asks if you have a Girlfriend?

In this scenario, you are talking to a girl that you are interested in dating. Firstly, as we have already covered, you are valuable in her eyes. There’s only a few reasons why she may be asking this question.

• You are too good for her
• Discounting you as a playboy
• Checking to see if you are free to date her
• Maybe you give off some signs that you are taken

You are too good for her. Maybe you are of such a high mate value, that she thinks that you are out of her league. Perhaps she thinks you are so attractive that you simply must have multiple girls around you and it would be impossible (in her mind) that you could be single. If this is the case, then you need to have a close look at yourself and ask why don’t you try for a higher mate value girl.

Perhaps girls on your level intimidate you, perhaps you are looking for easier girls to date etc. Either way, this is a good sign that you could be doing a lot better. If it’s a self confidence issue, then you should come up with strategies to increase your self confidence. I recommend this book ”How confidence works” by Ian Robertson .

Discounting you as a playboy. This is where most guys go wrong, they think that say ”I’m single” makes them out to be a loser. So instead they insinuate that they are players with many girls hanging off them, thinking that this is going to impress the girl.

Let me make it clear right now, this rarely impresses any girl, only a damaged girl with low self esteem would be impressed by this. Guys in the pua community call it ”preselection” and they think that it works with new girls, but I don’t think it does.

Here’s my take on it. Women only have one egg per month and that egg can only be used by one man. So, I tend to believe that a woman’s default is a monogamous relationship.

Let’s imagine that she got pregnant with a playboy that has many girls and is not committed to her. Well, in that scenario, the baby is unlikely to survive. Therefore picking a man that’s monogamous and devout to her, is the best strategy for the child’s survival.

This means that an obvious playboy will be rejected (most of the time) in my opinion and therefore using ”preselection” is a bad strategy.

Instead, your default answer should always be ”No, I’m single” or ”No, I don’t have a girlfriend”. Say it immediately and with confidence, in my opinion, being seen as a playboy is a bad idea.

Checking to see if you are free to date her. Maybe she’s really interested in you and she is looking for a serious relationship. Why would she want to waste her time with a guy that’s taken or not ready for a relationship too.

Keep in mind, women have almost unlimited opinions out there. It’s better for her to discount you right now, then to catch feelings for you and find herself stuck in a relationship that’s going no-where.

Maybe you give off some signs that you are taken. Some signs are quite subtle and women are tuned in like you can’t imagine. Maybe it’s something you are wearing, maybe it’s something you said.

It’s hard to know exactly what makes a woman get a feeling that you have a girlfriend and are trying to pick her up on the side. But one thing is for sure, they are designed to get ”a feeling” that something is not right and always remember that a woman’s default with dating men is to reject men.

As long as you always remember that women are mostly rejecting men and that’s there default, then you will start to be more aware of the subtle signs you may be giving off and try to avoid them.

Has a girl asked if you were single and you messed it up?

Here are some of my best posts:

• Cold approach is a lifestyle (My Philosphy)
• What is indirect daygame
• What I say to Girls (Logistics)
• How to Write a PickUp field report
• How to spot a fake dating coach
• How I got laid in Japan (epic post)
• Why Thailand is NO longer good for getting laid

If you want to learn more about the sweet art of cold approach, Enquire here, join my group, where I’ll have a chat to you before entering. Get my free video series and finally, if you are adventurous, try my 30 day challenge.