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Often, on the first day of coaching, I’ll ask a new client to approach a girl, he’ll turn to me and ask ”what should I say?”.

If I was given a dollar every time someone new to game has asked me ”what’s your opening line?” I’d be a millionaire. Well not exactly, maybe a few hundred dollars I guess. This thing is, for all beginners and even most intermediate guys, they focus on the opener way too much.

If you are struggling to meet women and get yourself a girlfriend, perhaps some coaching with me might be something that would interest you. Click here to find out more

In chess, there are entire books written on ”opening” a game of chess. The most famous is the ”Sicilian Defense” and there are books written on every opening strategy in chess. There are approximately 3000 opening moves in chess, just so you have an idea of how complex it can be.

The Perfect Pick Up Line

Conversation amongst people is quite complex, to think that some magic canned line would work, is too simplistic a way of thinking. If there are 3000 openings in chess, just imagine how many more ways to start a conversation there would be. Possibly millions of ways to start a conversation with a girl, if you want to start a conversation with a girl who is a tourist from a country that speaks different language than your native tongue. Then we have broken English, mixed with different cultural overtones. You get the picture, you have millions of different ”pick up lines” you can use.

This is good news ! for your verbal’s, you have no need to ever get bored using the same canned lines anymore. You can get creative and try something new everyday. One good way to keep game interesting for you, is to continuously try new things. This will help your longevity in the game.

How to Never Run Out of Things to Say to a Girl

Quite often if you are worried about what the perfect pick up line or conversation opener is, it’s more that you fear that opener will lead to a dead end and you’ll run out of things to say. When you are talking to me or your best friend, or a family member, I bet you never try to plan out the perfect way to have a conversation with any of us. Then why would you worry about running out of things to say to a stranger, even if she is a hot girl that you want to date.

Here are some of my most popular blog posts:

• Cold approach is a lifestyle
• How to get a younger girlfriend
• What is indirect game
• How to spot a fake dating coach
• How I got laid in Japan (epic post)

If you want to learn more about the sweet art of cold approach, join my group, where I’ll have a chat to you before entering. Get my free video series and finally, if you are adventurous, try my 30 day challenge.

Exposure to Rejection is Key

This is called exposure therapy, it’s when you get rejected over and over again, until you become a little immune to it. If you were to do a 30 day challenge which I made specifically for this reason. You can normalise the idea of talking to new girls in your life, build momentum with being social everyday. The funny thing is, you only need to speak to one or more girls per day for it to become normal over time. After a while, you won’t care anymore.

Stick in Set – Deal With The Social Pressure

Once you’ve started the conversation and you run out of things to say, stay there, deal with the pressure. Your fight or flight response will kick in, most guys response is flight though. Don’t run away as soon as it gets a little awkward, get used to the social pressure. The moment she looks at you as if ”so?”, just remember to stay calm, stay there, listen to what she says, respond to her in a calm way.

Lower The Bar For What’s Good Enough to Say

Just remember we are all simple creatures. You can talk about anything, sometimes, not always, but sometimes if you jump from topic to topic without any logical connection between them, you can come across as more spontaneous and fun to be around. I’ve heard some guys after getting into ”state” taking this too far, by saying some truly ridiculous things in nightclubs and they mostly got away with it, so I’m sure you’ll be just fine.

Be Curious About Her – Girls Love to Talk about Themselves

When she eventually shares something about herself, capitalise on it by listening closely, then help her to expand on what she just shared. Reward her for sharing, as this is a great way to build an emotional connection with her.

• Don’t talk over her (even if you are nervous)
• Listen carefully (even if the adrenalin is pumping)
• Help her to expand on her personal story (even when your mind is racing with nervous energy)
• Build an emotional connection

Open-Ended Questions

So many times I’ve heard a guy totally ignore some valuable information a girl just told him, then go off on a totally new tangent. If she tells you something about her, try to dig deeper, be curious about who she is.

Remember, you can respond in a way that leads to a dead end in the conversation or you can respond in a way that means that you are improvising of what she says with open-ended questions that lead the interaction forward.

What You Say May Not Be As Important As The Emotion Behind It

This is definitely something that you should be experimenting with. I’ve personally met girls in a range of different moods and energy levels, who have slept with me. I’d say that positivity is by far the most effective mood for meeting girls, in my opinion.

Low Energy and Sick – Positive : For instance, I was hung over from the night before, spent the morning throwing up, needless to say, I felt awful. The next day, I was worried that I’d still have too much alcohol in my system, so I decided to catch a bus home. Unfortunately, due to my brain not working very well, I caught the wrong bus. Because game is a lifestyle to me, even in my sickly state, this was a great opportunity for myself to start a conversation with a girl. A cute girl at the bus stop, told me exactly which bus I needed to catch next. I overstated how much she saved my life and that I’d like to repay her somehow, then I got her number. First date I took her to dinner and then straight home.

Low Energy – Negative : I’ve had a few clients who were low energy like myself in this scenario, but their vibe was more down, they came across angry or disturbed. This was a huge turn off to every girl these guys would talk to. It was low energy too, but not in a cool James Bond sort of way, or in a tired/sickly way, it came across almost nefarious.

My short term solution for him, was to do cardio exercise (boxing is good) and then have a cold shower straight after, then pump out a few approaches immediately, while having motivation music playing in his head phones. This artificially put him in a more positive state of mind for a short period of time, which was designed to help him build some momentum. Try it

Conversation Topics to Avoid

• Politics
• Work
• Race
• Religion
• What she’s studying

No matter how careful you are talking about these topics, there’s a high probability that something will go wrong. She might not agree with your world view on a range of touchy topics and this can make her associate you with the bad emotion she feels when thinking about these topics.

Whatever you are passionate about in your private life, will invariably reveal itself during your conversations. If you are spending time on these topics in your spare time, you might not realise that you are constantly pivoting back to these topics during conversations with girls. Sometimes the only solution to help your success with girls is to cut these topics out of your life for a while and introduce some new hobbies or shows into your life.

Build Rapport – Don’t Break Rapport

Here’s an example, just say she told you something bad happened today like she got a parking fine. You could break rapport by laughing and saying how much she deserved to get the parking fine or you could empathise with her by building rapport. I’d definitely recommend building rapport in any situation where she had something bad happen to her.

Another tip is, you can take it a step further by saying how much you dislike parking inspectors. Let her know that you and her are on the same side. If you have any opportunity to use the ”it’s us two verses the world” mentality, please use it, this is a golden strategy.

Find Out Her Passions

You can start with her hobbies, but usually in the early stages of a conversation, a girl will be a little guarded. She’ll tell you a few surface level hobbies she has, in a very objective way. This is entirely your job to dig deeper and find out what’s at the core of her hobbies, that’s her passion. As we discussed towards the top of this blog post, when she starts talking about herself, take full advantage of this, by helping her to open up more and more about herself.

What are her dreams?

Where does she want to be in 5 years from now?

Story Telling – Display High Value

With every good story, there is a hero (you) and a bad guy or bad situation. Then there is a moment when the hero triumphs over the bad guy or situation. Try to think about a time in your past when you overcame adversity and was victorious against all odds. Tell this story with as many visually descriptive words as possible and remember to be overly passionate while telling your story. It’s very important that you add parts to your story that display you as high value. As an example, your friends are celebrities, or you are wealthy or you are world class in a particular skill. Be creative

If you are struggling to meet women and get yourself a girlfriend, perhaps some coaching with me might be something that would interest you. Click here to find out more