How to stop being the nice guy? Why is it that the nice guy gets passed over? Why is it that women will talk to you about their problems, but never actually seem to care about yours? Why do women always go for the bad boy over the nice guy? The answer to all these questions is simple: because women are not attracted to men who are nice.

They are attracted to men who are strong and confident, and who know how to take charge of a situation. But what if you’re not one of those guys? What if you’re a good guy who has always been overlooked by the women you’ve dated? Well, there’s good news.

You CAN change, and with our advice on how to stop being the nice guy, you’ll be stronger as a man and well on your way to becoming a confident man who knows how to be string, stand up for himself and get what you want in life… and in love.

How to overcome and stop being a nice guy

Have you ever been the nice guy?

I know I have. And I was frustrated.

Being a weak “nice guy” is not good and frustrating because women will pass you to the side, not caring about your opinion. Women will be asking you about chatter instead chat about you.

It’s time for this to stop.

In this mens dating advice article, we will discuss tips to overcome and stop being a nice guy.

Say No, Don’t Be Exploited By Women

Don’t be exploited, that’s the huge issue. If she’s always asking for favors, especially early on when you’re trying to get that girl, then it’s not cool.

If she asks you to help with her homework and then you spend all your weekend doing it for her, and she enjoyed it, don’t do that. Be nice, but don’t let yourself be manipulated into doing things you don’t want to do just because someone wants you to.

Weak men’s biggest problem with being a nice guy around women is that you don’t know how to say no.

If she’s asking you to do something and it doesn’t sound like fun, or if it sounds like too much work, don’t do it. If she’s asking you to do something and it sounds like fun but will take up most of your day, don’t do it.

If she’s asking you to do something and it sounds like fun but will take up most of your week, DON’T DO IT.

In short: If it doesn’t sound like fun, don’t do it.

Nice Guys Are Destroying Society

This is a good dating advice for men rule of thumb because when you’re doing things that are not fun for other people (like homework or housework), they are not going to want to spend much time with you anyway. So why bother?
Being a nice guy is the worst.

It’s horrible, and it’s destroying society. You think you’re going to get something back for being so nice, but you don’t.
If anything, by being a pleaser you make yourself an easy target for people who want to take advantage of your good nature.
Think about that:

You find out some information about someone and they confide in you. Then someone comes along who has been their enemy for years, and they demand that you give them the information they need to destroy this person’s life.

What do you do? Well, if you’re a nice guy… well then you’re probably not going to be doing much of anything at all. Because being a nice guy means avoiding drama at all costs, even if that means letting someone else cause it on their own terms.

Tell her what you want, set boundaries

So, you’re a nice guy. You help your friends, you do their homework, and you’re always there to move them into their new apartments. But here’s the thing: being nice isn’t going to get you anywhere in life.

You’re never going to make real connections with people if all you’re doing is helping them out. And you can’t show people how much value they can get out of having a relationship with you if they don’t know how valuable they are themselves.

If you don’t set boundaries for yourself and let people know what’s okay and what’s not okay for them to ask from you, then not only will your relationships suffer but society will suffer too. If everyone was just helping each other out without any boundaries or expectations, then nobody would ever be able to focus on their own goals and dreams because they’d have to spend all their time helping other people instead of themselves.

So please: set some boundaries for yourself (and let others know what those boundaries are). Society as a whole would be far better off as a whole as long as we all take care of ourselves first and that means giving YOURSELF permission to stop being so nice.

Stop Hiding your Flaws as a Man

One of the biggest mistakes that nice guys make is hiding their true selves from everyone else.

They think that others will judge them or look down on them if they find out who they really are, so they try to keep up appearances by pretending that everything is perfect all the time. You might think that this is helping people love you more, but what it really does is make it impossible for anyone to get close enough to truly get to know you.

Instead of trying to hide all your flaws and trying so hard to be perfect all the time, just be yourself. If someone doesn’t like you because of who you are then they probably weren’t worth your time in the first place.

Stop Transactional Crap

So stop this transitional crap and start being selfish. Selfishness is key when it comes to trying to “stop being a nice guy.” In a lot of ways, being a nice guy is just being a doormat – you’re always putting other people’s needs before your own, and as a result, you never really get what you want.

If, as a single man, you’re always putting other people first, you’re never going to get what you want out of life. So be selfish – put yourself first for once, and see what happens. It’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it.

Another simple (dating advice for men) way of looking at it is a transactional relationship – you think that being a nice guy means that eventually, she’ll come around because you are nice and she’s gonna have sex with you.

But that’s not how it works. Just because you do favors for someone doesn’t mean they owe you anything, least of all sex. So stop this transitional crap and start being selfish. It’s the only way you’re going to get what you want out of life.

Being too nice can sometimes make you seem like a pushover, and girls don’t always want that. You need to be able to set boundaries and be assertive. Otherwise, she might just end up friend-zoning you.

Know what you want in life

Stop being a nice guy, you are not her friend. You are dating because you want something from her. If she is not interested in you for what you want, then there is no point in continuing the relationship.

Know what you want in life and be clear about it. If you are looking for a relationship, then let her know what type of relationship you want. If she does not want the same thing as you, then move on and find someone who does.

If she asks for advice or help with something, tell her no if it is going against your beliefs and values. Letting someone walk over you just because they asked nicely will only lead to resentment towards them and towards yourself.

Decide what is important to you and stick with it no matter what happens Don’t give up on dating until you find someone who meets all of your requirements (physical attraction being number one).

Over Compensating

If you do everything that everyone asks of you and never say no or take up space or ask for what you want, then people will take advantage of your kindness. And that’s not good for anyone.

So how do we stop being the nice guy? By overcompensating. That means doing all the things that people have told us not to do because they’re bad or mean or unkind (we’ll get into those later). But by doing these things, we start to see how they work in our lives.

For example: saying no more often than yes means that people will respect your boundaries and realize that sometimes they need to back off instead of pushing themselves on others.

Or asking someone out might mean they think twice before treating you like an object or ignoring your feelings when something goes wrong between them and someone else. When you set boundaries with others, they’ll be more likely to respect them and that’s the best way to get what you want in life.

Here are some of my best posts:

• Cold approach is a lifestyle
• What is indirect daygame
• How to Write a PickUp field report
• How to spot a fake dating coach
• How I got laid in Japan (epic post)
• Why Thailand is NO longer good for getting laid

If you want to learn more about the sweet art of cold approach, Enquire here, join my group, where I’ll have a chat to you before entering. Get my free video series and finally, if you are adventurous, try my 30 day challenge.