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Some of the dating advice out there, states that you should sexualise the conversation before taking a girl home. Some guru’s say that you should talk in a sexual way, so that she knows you want to sleep with her, before taking her home. This is supposed to increase the probability of her sleeping with you, when she’s back at your place, in your bed.
The second part of this strategy, is that, if she’s not keen on sleeping with you. You can find out at the nightclub, so you can move to the next girl, and keep approaching until you find a girl who agrees to sleep with you.
The theory :
- Sexualise before taking the girl home (Increases the probability she will sleep with you)
- Keep approaching until you find a ‘yes’ girl
Sexualising The Conversation Before You Take Her Home
Let’s set the scene, you’ve met a girl through cold approach. You guys don’t know each other that well, perhaps it’s in a nightclub. Correct me if I’m wrong, the idea is that you should sexualise the conversation before pulling her back to your place, so that she knows what you want to have sex with her. Intuitively, this make perfect sense, especially when you don’t enough experience with pulling many girls home.
My question is : What if She Likes You and Wants to take it Slow?
You can stick with her, or you can leave her and approach a new girl. This is a tough decision to make. The very fact that you have decided to use the strategy of sexualising the conversation with her before pulling home, just puts yourself in a tough position. I’d suggest that you are putting way to much pressure on making a decision, way too soon.
What if you try sexualise the conversation and she throws ”shit tests” at you. Yet you misunderstand the signs and move onto the next approach, when this girl just didn’t like public displays of affection. What about that?
She Can Change Her Mind About Sex At Any Moment
Women love to change their minds at any moment, which means that there are no guarantees out there. She could be into you when leaving the club and totally change her mind when she gets to your place. And if that was to happen, then the idea of sexualising before pulling, may not feel very effective.
Sometimes in my experience, you can make out with a girl in the club, she will become so hot and heavy. Then cool down on the way to your place, which means you may need to warm her up again. Or she may become cold and lose interest in you.
This is why you meet girls in the club that seem so into you, you exchange contact information (instead of pulling) then she ghosts you the next day. It’s because she was into the moment and when that moment passed, she lost interest.
Focus on the Process of Pulling Home
Instead of focussing on sexualising before pulling home, perhaps you should just be focussing on the process of pulling. A girl who agrees to come home with you, is clearly keen on you. Sure, you didn’t sexualise the interaction before pulling and therefore not sure if she wants to sleep with you tonight, but she is clearly curious enough to go home with you.
She might not seem keen on sleeping with you now, but she could change her mind in the other direction, if you are a cool guy, treat her well and manage to build an emotional connection.
Pull to Lay Ratio
Most years I’ve reviewed my stats, I almost always discover that I’ve pulled approximately double the amount of girls home, than I have laid. This may be quite disappointing, but women change their minds all the time. And this just comes with the territory. But, I’d much rather focus on the process of pulling, than screening for girls who have somewhat agreed to sleep with me.
Quite often girls I’ve pulled once will come back to see me another time and the next time, she might sleep with me.
Be patient, one positive here is, she’s already been to your place once, this means she is more likely to come back a second time.
Some Girls Don’t Like Public Display’s of Affection
Sometimes it’s just a cultural thing or she simply see’s herself as more of a traditional woman. Some girls just feel uncomfortable with any form of public display of affection. And in my experience, it’s been a deal breaker on a few occasions. Usually girls are quite forgiving, though I have come across a few girls that were not.
Logistics are Everything
Trying to sexualise outside and a long way from the bedroom, in my opinion. Let’s use a soccer analogy. It’s like asking your own goal keeper to kick the winning goal from the other end of the field. It’s best to get the ball to the other end of the field, give it to the striker and that will increase the probability of success.
In my opinion, it’s best to try score at home. Wait until you have her at your place before you try escalate.
How often do you take girls home from the nightclub?
Here are some of my best posts:
- Cold approach is a lifestyle (My Philosphy)
- What is indirect daygame
- What I say to Girls (Logistics)
- How to Write a PickUp field report
- How to spot a fake dating coach
- How I got laid in Japan (epic post)
- Why Thailand is NO longer good for getting laid
If you want to learn more about the sweet art of cold approach, Enquire here, join my group, where I’ll have a chat to you before entering. Get my free video series and finally, if you are adventurous, try my 30 day challenge.
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