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How to do a seated approach, let’s just get straight into this. What we have here are two different approaches. I’m going to break them both down.

I guided a client live while he was approaching a random girl. I said “say hello and then sit down,” he said something funny.

She pointed at him. He’s got his head kind of tilted over like he’s dressed well. And she is seated on a bench here. It’s just outside in front of a cafe.

There are lots of people around. It’s a highly-populated area. There’s a spare seat. It’s a long bench.

There’s plenty of room for him to sit down. If you go over there and just stand in front of someone, it can just make them feel a little bit uncomfortable.

So you should if she’s sitting there and you say hello, just sit down. Just sit down and then try to strike up a conversation that way.

I commented on the head thing. It’s got the head kind of down, I think just standing up straight with good posture, not like you’re talking to a child that’s sitting down.

She’s smiling. And so you can see I’m getting a little bit frustrated because the client was not sitting down with her on the bench.

But if you have a close look at it, it’s like, okay, well, I know she’s got a phone in her hand. She’s sitting there.

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She’s got a few minutes after just. Saying hello, you could just say, look, is it okay if I sit down there? There’s a possibility she goes, oh, no, I’ve got a friend coming or something like that.

Most of the time, if you say, Can I sit down? Just out of politeness, most girls will just immediately say, yes, sure.

And then you start your conversation. You start your rap, you try to run your game, and see how it goes. But standing over her, just put too much pressure on her. It’s as if, like, what does something need to happen right now?

A little bit too much pressure. Sure, when you get into the conversation, she’s a yes girl off the daygame cold approach.

And if you wanted to, it’s a risky thing to do. Just invited you to move on with me straight away. What are you doing right now? Do you want to get a coffee? You’re waiting you’re about to order food or you’re on your lunch break.

Come have lunch with me while standing and then just try to ask her immediately. You might get lucky. She might just go, oh, yeah, she might be.

Yes, girl. Most of the time it’s better just to introduce yourself and sit down.

The worst thing you could do is stand there.

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Afterward, I said, “What are you doing? I have a feeling he’s going to reject any minute now”. So she’s loving it. She’s giggling, she’s laughing.

She thinks he’s making some funny jokes, but then you can it looks like she’s made three big movements and laughed.

You could sit down at that stage, take a lot of the pressure off, and then have a more mature, level-headed conversation.

Again I said, “Sit. Don’t put your hands on your hips. She touched her head”. See, now you can kind of see literally within 30 seconds. It’s already at the point where she’s looking down a bit more often.

He’s at the point where he’s put his hands on his hips. They’ve hit a lull and it happens fast. It can happen literally within 30 seconds.

This interaction has only been going 30 seconds, and it’s already gone from the shock of saying hello to a stranger to spiking her, by the looks of things, three times with three kinds of little jokey, little jabs. I don’t know exactly what he said.

But at that point, sit down, lower the vibe, and try to have a more level-headed conversation. Do you know what happened after that, it ended?

Now, I guided him again to go to another girl this time, this is the second case I told you but yeah, literally within a couple of seconds, he needed to just sit down and lower the vibe a little bit.

He spiked it a little bit too much, in my opinion as well. A little bit too jokey. Now here’s another one where the girl is across the road.

Okay at this point he’s just stepped up from crossing the road.

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He’s opened his mouth from a long distance away, even the construction work walking by noticed she turns to the left and he’s got her attention from a long-distance away.

He’s not standing over the top of her and starting the conversation. He’s starting it from a distance. This is very important, and there’s no reason why you can’t do this. I get it.

A lot of people think if I’m too loud from what, three, 4 meters away, 5 meters away, I’m going to have to project my voice louder.

I’m going to have onlookers like this, and it’s going to be a little bit scarier but in fact, it’s the reverse because when you do that this onlooker thinks that you guys know each other when this is a cold approach, immediately she smiled.

She’s noticed he’s confident the construction workers thinking, oh, damn, I’ve never spoken to a girl like that in my life she’s still smiling.

We do have another onlooker here. It is important to have good situational awareness.

I get it. When you’re in the middle of an approach, it is hard to notice all of the onlookers around and what they think but that’s a cold approach, guys.

That’s how it is. Boom! She just had a little glimpse and that was it. See the initial starting of the conversation can get a few little looks but then they look away.

The construction worker no doubt looked away as well straight afterward they will just assume that you guys know each other right now you can see how her purple dress is the same color as his purple shoes and he’s pointing at his purple shoes so we got the same colors.

My shoes are the same color as your dress. Now you might think that is an awful way to start a conversation but it’s his vibe.

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It’s his confidence he’s come over to meet her if he was to say something like, oh, I love your dress it’s sexy or something like that would be weird but just having some.

Sort of a conversation that you can both look at.

Oh, look, we’ve got the same shoes. That’s actually what he said, by the way. But immediately the handshake so he’s become physical literally within how long? Not even 10 seconds.

So within 10 seconds, he’s gone from hello to a stranger to some sort of random little comment on something in the environment.

I often recommend that most of you guys do that the comments on the environment.

If you know, if he says that you’ve got something in common or points at something in the environment, that’s a good way to start up a conversation. She knows that that’s not really why you’re coming to say hello. She’s not stupid.

Then you’ve got physical by holding the hand. It’s not physical, but it’s introducing himself, especially in the environment of COVID, where people are paranoid about the virus.

And that if she’s willing to shake your hand, that is in this environment, a lot more valuable than the pre-covered Era, were shaking the hand was just a little bit weird and it was a little bit too formal.

So I wouldn’t recommend the guys do that. But if she’s willing to hug you or shake your hand, that is a show of trust immediately within what looks like 11 seconds of saying hello.

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So that’s a sign of her being adventurous, being a little bit outgoing. Now at this point, he should say, hey, look, is it cool if I sit down?

Can I pull up a seat and sit down with her? Or literally while standing there, just throw in the Hail Mary and ask her to go directly for something.

You want to come for a walk, you want to go for lunch? What are you doing for lunch? You’re hungry? Something at all? Coffee, drink, you name it. You can just throw it out there and get her moving.

But that would be generally a tough thing and it’s a low probability place. The highest probability is to sit down and just have a chat.

Let’s see what he does. but yeah, and then he did step back a little bit.

He stood back and gave her a little bit more space. He’s not standing over her as much. We are not even 15 seconds into this approach.

It’s coming up to the point where he needs to sit down. He needs to decide on what he’s going to do.

Because this does move fast, guys, you have 10, 15 seconds or 20 seconds maximum to make an impression. It does happen that fast approach. I told him to sit down with her.

They’re into a bit of a conversation. He was just asking what is she doing right now? Which is something that I recommend, which is to go straight into logistics.

What are you doing right now? Are you busy right now? Because if she’s not busy right now, you can take her on an instant date.

Does she live or work around this area? Because then you can try to figure it out.

Okay, well, this is the area where we should line up our date if she’s too busy right now. Right? So within pretty much exactly 20, 25 seconds, you need to make a decision and either sit down.

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Not always, obviously, but standing over the top of someone who is seated can be a little bit intimidating, depending on the person, depending on their personality, etc.

But as you can see here, he pretty much went straight into logistics, which I recommend, and then you want to go for a drink, and then she agreed.

I again told him

“Unless you get her moving immediately or find out a way to sit down. If you’re stuck there doing that”. So around here is when he went into logistics.

I told him “standard approach can be a bit of a problem”.

And then she starts telling him that she doesn’t really have any plans and she lives around.

And then boom, off they go. They went off on an instant date that then ended up they ended up going to the movies, they ended up having a few drinks together and spending the night together.

So it was a good night. And that’s how you should attempt to deal with a girl that is seated.

You go over there, you have a matter of seconds to make a decision.

The default is to go over, introduce yourself and then make some sort of a comment on something in the environment, ask them what they’re doing right now and then sit and then try to run your game while being in a seated approach.

That’s how you should do it. In simplistic terms, it can be a little bit more complex.

This is just the default how you should do it the standard way, depending on who you are, and what you look like? Type of girl, you’re approaching? The environment, you’re in? The way that you handle social situations?

But yeah, that’s the basic understanding of how you should do it.

Here are some of my best posts:

• Cold approach is a lifestyle (My Philosphy)
• What is indirect daygame
• What I say to Girls (Logistics)
• How to Write a PickUp field report
• How to spot a fake dating coach
• How I got laid in Japan (epic post)
• Why Thailand is NO longer good for getting laid

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